Doing the Best Right Thing

We are consistently bombarded with choices.  It is the very nature of being human, being free, living in a world free from restraint and confinement.  Truly, no one tells us what to think, right?

So, when we make decisions how can we make the right one?  Or in this case, the best right one?  What is the standard by which best right decisions are made?  We can choose the easy way to do it. Or we can always strive for the right answer.

There are many books available on ethics and ethical living and what I have discovered is that there isn’t a separate guide for ethics in work or business and one for our personal lives and one for our volunteer work and organizations and relationships - - if you choose to be ethical you choose a single standard across the board.  The key component in this last statement is “if you choose” and the process is very simple: make good decisions, tell the truth and be considerate of others.

Businesses today are striving more and more toward a paradigm shift by recognizing the need for ethics, values, goals and higher expectations in leadership and customer service. Employees want to trust management to keep their word and keep them safe in the workplace. 

Today, however, I want to address our personal lives and how ethical living begins here and overflows into every facet of our existence.

Step one is to uphold the Golden Rule and continually keep in mind the impact of our actions on others.  It is important to take time moment by moment and look at the bigger picture.  How would you want to be treated in a similar situation? 

I find in my research the golden rule is consistent in all cultures and major religions around the world.  The language and terminology may not specify the action as “the Golden Rule”, but the concept is the same.  Today, I offer a few of these for your contemplation:

“Treat not others in ways that you yourself would find hurtful.”  Buddhism

“This is the sum of duty: do not do to others what would cause pain if done to you.”  Hinduism

“One word which sums up the basis of all good conduct . . . loving kindness.  Do not do to others what you do not want done to yourself.”  Confucianism

“No one of you truly believes until you wish for others what you wish for yourself.” Islam

“What is hateful to you, do not do to your neighbor.  This is the whole Torah: all the rest is commentary.’” Judaism

“In everything, do to others as you would have them do to you; for this is the law and the prophets.” Christianity

“We are as much alive as we keep the earth alive.” Native American Spirituality

“Lay not on any soul a load that you would not wish to be laid upon you, and desire not for anyone the things you would not desire for yourself.”  Baha’i Faith

A great test question for each of us to ensure we make the best right choice is, “Would I be okay with someone doing this to me?”

When we look at responsibility to others and the planet and how we handle it we are learning the value of character.  Unfortunately we are judged by our actions and words from those outside and we often justify ourselves by our intentions (internal mindset).  Intending or wanting to do something and actually doing it isn’t the same.  The difference is action.  And the thing that helps ensure action happens is accountability.

When we take accountability for ourselves, our lives, our actions, and our results we alter the perception of others but developing our character.  The idea here is to keep in mind someone is always watching.  Even when we are alone in the comfort and solitude or our home, our inner self is watching and deciding on whether or not we can be trusted.  The result in these intimate choices is either self love and self respect or when poor choices are made result in self loathing and shame.

We must discipline ourselves to do the right thing, recognize our weaknesses, and develop relationships of trust to ensure we have someone to turn to when the lines of ethical decision making seem to blur.  Keep in mind, there will be times when we may sabotage our own integrity through choices we have decided are easier.  This is a behavior we may habitually resort to in times of stress.  When looking for survival or control we have a tendency to slip into old patterns.   The key is to realize there will always be times of stress and we must find a responsible way to return to center when sensing we are under attack.  It is in these times we must develop the positive attributes that hold our hidden strengths.  This will help us be more balanced and able to counteract moods, anxiety and obsessive behavior.  This self awareness motivates us to recognize the need for growth eliminating less effective ways of coping.

Now the concept comes full circle.  It is important to make good decisions, tell the truth and be considerate of others.  And when life throws you a cure ball, take responsibility for your actions, be accountable for every outcome and avoid habitual patterns that lead to self sabotage.

Living ethically is doing the right thing at the right time; a standard by which we make our best decisions. Ethical behavior is a human activity.  As with most activities we can improve our performance with practice.  This week is the perfect time to practice good decisions, being truthful and being kind and considerate to everyone around us.

It takes commitment to do the right thing – regardless of what may come your way.  Each of us is leaving a legacy, and for me, it is holding myself to the standard of doing the best right thing, every day, every time in every situation.