Garbage In; Garbage Out

Whatever we take in – we give out.  This reminds me of an old nursery rhyme, “whatever Miss T eats, turns into Miss T.  How we spend every minute of every day determines what we have to give out to the rest of the planet.  If your patience is strained and your outlook paled or disgruntled, you may want to look at the nutrition you are providing your mental and spiritual appetite.

The question arises as to how we spend our time and what type of criteria we “feed” ourselves.  Do you listen to positive music?  Do you read books that inspire?  Do you watch television selectively, or do you allow drama, negativity and damaging programs to be your daily “entertainment”?  Are your conversations supportive and upbeat, or is your focus on what is wrong with others and the world around you?

I made a decision a few months ago to watch more comedy on television in a desire to seek more healing laughter in my life.  It didn’t take long to realize what the world of entertainment sees today as funny is often derogatory, demeaning, abusive, sarcastic and, yes, sometimes vulgar in content.

This awareness led to a need to be extremely selective of my input.  I can’t help asking, do we really need to tear one another apart to be funny?  Does humor today require detailed information regarding bodily functions, sexuality and ethnicity in such a way that the resulting chuckles or laughter sound strained and uncomfortable?  Then why does it continue? 

The answer is that somewhere a majority is condoning this type of comedy.  That is the only way television shows, comedians and radio stay afloat.  Their work and their output is accepted, appreciated and promoted.

Our world today is so different than ten short years ago.  With a PC (or two) in 99% of our homes and a cell phone in the hands of almost everyone over the age of ten we have instant access to world events.  This includes, in addition to ‘comedy’, major news events, pictures with graphic content and stories that require discretion in viewing and audience.   When followed with family discussions we can keep these issues in better perspective and protect one another as well as the minds of our youth.

I am afraid we don’t always create the opportunity to do this.  What happens more often is that the information is shared, spread, redistributed with commentary and the “conversation” that needs to follow up never takes place. We are left with the garbage that has been dumped on us, downloaded or forwarded via transparent lines of today’s technological communication.

We have the ability to see prominent people at their worst moments in life.  We can even video or photograph a family member or friend in an embarrassing or humiliating situation and send it to hundreds of thousands of people in a split second.

And as we continue to listen and watch we find ourselves shocked, intrigued, or disgusted - - and we make a decision.  This decision is to spread this shock through our channels of communication or, to halt it, reverse it and create more positive exchange.

Each time one of us experiences the dark side of life and we take time to share it we support an energy that allows it to expand.  Let me explain further.  The energy and vibration of all life is continuous and whatever we focus on remains.  Each one of us has the ability to promote positive thought and action or deter it.  When you hear a horrific story of abuse or a popular film star childishly throwing a tantrum on international television - you are given a choice.  Keep in mind that the results of our negative banters, detrimental slams, tirades and tantrums leave lasting scars.

There is a short story I read once about a little boy exhibiting serious negative behavior. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him every time this happened he needed to hammer a nail into the back of their fence. The first day the boy drove 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, however, he became more aware of his behavior and began to manage it.  Eventually the number of nails dwindled down to zero. He had discovered that awareness and effort could alter his behavior in a positive way.

When he shared this with his father, it was suggested the boy now pull out one nail for each day he continued to own his actions. Once all the nails had been removed, father and son stood again before the fence.

The father told his son he had done well, but pointed out the lasting effect of the holes in the fence. The moral here is that our behaviors, our speech and our negative actions leave lasting scars just like the holes in the fence.

Sharing scandalous and alarming information is like this boy hammering nails into a fence. If the hammer is our desire to spread angst and the nails represent the negative stories the same thing happens any time we attempt to un-do what has been done.  There is a lasting hole, a wound on the heart of humanity.

Consider carefully who you really want to share your shocking story with - - especially now you understand your actions and your words will leave only garbage in your wake.

The choice can be to turn away from it – by seeking the positive message and share that.  This is how we become distributors of the light.  It is with this choice we create and reinforce a healing energy that uplifts and supports instead of tearing down.

I am not suggesting you stop watching the news or ignore what is taking place around you.  I am not even suggesting you avoid the internet or your favorite comedy show.  What I am proposing is that each of us take a stand for what we allow into our lives as well as what we choose to pass on.  We can make our lives richer and this world a better place when we stand for good, graciousness, love, kindness, compassion, inclusivity and peace.

When we are accountable for our every action, we become aware of those moments when a conversation turns sour, or negative.  We recognize our input and output, however brief, leaves a mucky footprint on the vibration of our being and that of others.

We have hundreds of thousands of people on our planet who need love, hope, kindness and respect right now.  We each have an opportunity to promote humanity or to damage the human spirit.

Our country has been stunned over and over again at the devastation of natural events and loss of human life.  Together we have shed tears of empathy for those who have been in harms way.  We see the impact of loss of home, health, family members, friends, communities, food sources, and basic comforts. 
What can we do?  We can focus on how to help.  We can pray for the highest and best in every situation.  And we can immerse ourselves in the inspiring stories of survival, the undaunted human spirit and the amazing miracles that abound.

Today, each of us is called to a higher path.  Whether you are an adult or a child, you can step up and support those in crises and those in need.  We can each begin by monitoring our own consumption of garbage. The next step is to develop an awareness of what we share and how we share it.  Then, as we build the energy required to rescue and support the population we begin to look at what each of us has to give.  It isn’t always about money, but it is always about heart.

You are being called to take a stand for the planet and send your positive energy out across the world.  From this spot where you are standing or sitting right now, you can begin.  You can envision peaceful solutions, rescues and rebuilding. You can send healing light and energy to any person, family, city or country.  You can do this here and now.

This week we can all let go of the garbage and spread the beauty of our hearts, the joy of living this amazing life and focus on the hope of a brighter tomorrow.

Doing the Best Right Thing

We are consistently bombarded with choices.  It is the very nature of being human, being free, living in a world free from restraint and confinement.  Truly, no one tells us what to think, right?

So, when we make decisions how can we make the right one?  Or in this case, the best right one?  What is the standard by which best right decisions are made?  We can choose the easy way to do it. Or we can always strive for the right answer.

There are many books available on ethics and ethical living and what I have discovered is that there isn’t a separate guide for ethics in work or business and one for our personal lives and one for our volunteer work and organizations and relationships - - if you choose to be ethical you choose a single standard across the board.  The key component in this last statement is “if you choose” and the process is very simple: make good decisions, tell the truth and be considerate of others.

Businesses today are striving more and more toward a paradigm shift by recognizing the need for ethics, values, goals and higher expectations in leadership and customer service. Employees want to trust management to keep their word and keep them safe in the workplace. 

Today, however, I want to address our personal lives and how ethical living begins here and overflows into every facet of our existence.

Step one is to uphold the Golden Rule and continually keep in mind the impact of our actions on others.  It is important to take time moment by moment and look at the bigger picture.  How would you want to be treated in a similar situation? 

I find in my research the golden rule is consistent in all cultures and major religions around the world.  The language and terminology may not specify the action as “the Golden Rule”, but the concept is the same.  Today, I offer a few of these for your contemplation:

“Treat not others in ways that you yourself would find hurtful.”  Buddhism

“This is the sum of duty: do not do to others what would cause pain if done to you.”  Hinduism

“One word which sums up the basis of all good conduct . . . loving kindness.  Do not do to others what you do not want done to yourself.”  Confucianism

“No one of you truly believes until you wish for others what you wish for yourself.” Islam

“What is hateful to you, do not do to your neighbor.  This is the whole Torah: all the rest is commentary.’” Judaism

“In everything, do to others as you would have them do to you; for this is the law and the prophets.” Christianity

“We are as much alive as we keep the earth alive.” Native American Spirituality

“Lay not on any soul a load that you would not wish to be laid upon you, and desire not for anyone the things you would not desire for yourself.”  Baha’i Faith

A great test question for each of us to ensure we make the best right choice is, “Would I be okay with someone doing this to me?”

When we look at responsibility to others and the planet and how we handle it we are learning the value of character.  Unfortunately we are judged by our actions and words from those outside and we often justify ourselves by our intentions (internal mindset).  Intending or wanting to do something and actually doing it isn’t the same.  The difference is action.  And the thing that helps ensure action happens is accountability.

When we take accountability for ourselves, our lives, our actions, and our results we alter the perception of others but developing our character.  The idea here is to keep in mind someone is always watching.  Even when we are alone in the comfort and solitude or our home, our inner self is watching and deciding on whether or not we can be trusted.  The result in these intimate choices is either self love and self respect or when poor choices are made result in self loathing and shame.

We must discipline ourselves to do the right thing, recognize our weaknesses, and develop relationships of trust to ensure we have someone to turn to when the lines of ethical decision making seem to blur.  Keep in mind, there will be times when we may sabotage our own integrity through choices we have decided are easier.  This is a behavior we may habitually resort to in times of stress.  When looking for survival or control we have a tendency to slip into old patterns.   The key is to realize there will always be times of stress and we must find a responsible way to return to center when sensing we are under attack.  It is in these times we must develop the positive attributes that hold our hidden strengths.  This will help us be more balanced and able to counteract moods, anxiety and obsessive behavior.  This self awareness motivates us to recognize the need for growth eliminating less effective ways of coping.

Now the concept comes full circle.  It is important to make good decisions, tell the truth and be considerate of others.  And when life throws you a cure ball, take responsibility for your actions, be accountable for every outcome and avoid habitual patterns that lead to self sabotage.

Living ethically is doing the right thing at the right time; a standard by which we make our best decisions. Ethical behavior is a human activity.  As with most activities we can improve our performance with practice.  This week is the perfect time to practice good decisions, being truthful and being kind and considerate to everyone around us.

It takes commitment to do the right thing – regardless of what may come your way.  Each of us is leaving a legacy, and for me, it is holding myself to the standard of doing the best right thing, every day, every time in every situation.

Inner Wisdom

It happens more often then we might realize.  That instant, a split second when you know, simply know to take another route to work, or that someone needs a comforting word or phone call.  The gentle whisper of your inner spirit is there, within, speaking to you – guiding you.  And suddenly, you just know something you didn’t know the moment before.

It is a good practice to listen carefully to this feeling, knowing it is guiding you through your daily journey.  It may be the source of your deepest personal truth.

There may be times when this truth comes into your awareness as an inner voice, while at others it may appear as an image or a loud gong; demanding your attention.

As we grow older we learn to listen and pay attention to the message.  There are times when it has saved us from delays or angst over a pending challenge in life.  Possibly taking that alternate route to work over some minor “nudge” saved you from a route that would have taken too much time and you would have been detained or delayed.

If your life has been anything like mine, you may have been told an untruth or two about what is happening around you.  There was a time when you may have been told not to listen to that inner voice.  And quite possibly you were told nothing was wrong when every fiber of your being was screaming that it was.  We were trained to ignore the voice within, to deny the truth and believe the lie.

After years of being told life is okay, when it really wasn’t, it has become difficult to re-establish that connection.  We have practiced the belief that our inner voice is a false signal and now we need to turn that around.

In the same respect it will take practice to learn to trust yourself and your inner wisdom to guide and protect you when you have ignored it for far too long.  Some of you have even decided there is no such thing as intuition – for you I will suggest a different word – call it, instinct, a hunch, insight or perception. 

Like every new idea in life, developing your intuition, requires baby steps.  It took a lot of work and practice to learn to ignore your knowing and it will take practice to re-awaken this powerful tool. 

Truly learning to follow your inner guide is deeper than words and often times more compelling than logic or rationale.  Each of us has this inner voice, the wisdom that has been with us from the beginning.  This wisdom will guide you in every endeavor.  It will solve any problem, lead you to the perfect job, or loving relationship - - even guide you to the book on the shelf that has answers to your needs right now.

We are all intuitive.  The messages and the voice have never stopped.  If you take a moment to consider this you will realize the wisdom has never left you.  It is still here, waiting for you to give it your undivided attention.  Waiting for you to begin again, to trust yourself and know that sometimes there is simply no reason for what we know we must do.

And when we take that first step to listen and follow the voice of wisdom . . . well, doors open, opportunities arise, financial backing appears and the path becomes illuminated and clear.  This reunion with our intuition brings us home to ourselves and our divine nature.  This is how we remember our purpose and reignite the flame in our hearts to the limitless mystery of Life and all that we can become.

Purposeful Participation

Each of us is a part of a community, family, relationship, workgroup, etc.  When you look at all the different relationships in your life it is surprising to see the unique social structure of each one.

Some of the groups you are a part of may seem completely independent of all the rest.  Then, there are times when the dynamics seem to overlap.  You suddenly become aware that someone from one area of your life is connected somehow to another person in a completely different part of your life.  Whatever you do, wherever you go, you are a part of something bigger than you are independently.

We all have work, family, friends, spiritual relationships - - at one level or another.  In addition, we may have the relationships at the doctor’s office, or grocery or department store where we shop frequently.

So, what do you suppose is our responsibility to these relationships?  Do we simply float in and out of them - - participating only when required?  Or do we contribute a valuable piece to each group?

Certainly the latter is the better answer.  We are all asked to contribute and how much we give and how often are entirely up to us.

Consider each group - - each social setting - - as something comprised of many unique and different parts.  Lets use the analogy of a car engine here and consider all of the unique parts that create a fully, functioning motor that operates your car at the turn of a switch.

You have ignition wires, hoses, valves, spark plugs, timing chains, a water pump, fuel pump, air filter, battery, fuses, and nuts and bolts.  Each item has its unique character and function.  Very few of the parts are interchangeable and must remain intact to successfully move the vehicle from one location to another and operate heat, air-conditioning, window wipers, door locks and so on.

When something goes amiss, it could be a simple item that has expired, broken or come loose and fallen off.  Ignoring this minor issue only leads to greater expense and complications over time.

Now, put yourself back into the picture of the teams, communities and relationships you share.  What happens when you withdraw, avoid participation or simply “check out”?  Does the group continue to function at the highest level?  Does the team move forward without you?  Do you allow yourself to believe you are insignificant and no one will notice your absence?

Whatever story you have told yourself there may be a deeper meaning that you have ignored.  The group, family, spiritual community, intimate relationship would not be the same without all players, all contributors.  We each have a role, a purpose, and a responsibility to the whole.  When we give our all life is rich and more rewarding and every relationship is more fulfilling.  And just like the parts of the engine, each of us needs to be finely tuned and cared for.  It is important to find balance between social and solitude.  This balance is a fine line for giving as well as receiving.

Yes, each one of us is a part of something bigger.  We are not alone, we are here, together, to help, support, encourage, and love and be loved.

And everyone one of us is of great value.  There is no one greater or smaller as each of us equally creates and co-creates every experience.  Doesn’t it make good sense to be all that you can be and do all that you can do and thrive, and soar and shine?

I believe it does.  Each one of us is here on purpose and we are all part of the grand design to make this world a better place. 

This week offers many opportunities to give more than you receive, to share more than you have been asked and to love more than you think is wise.  How will you choose to participate?